Are you an open book?
Do you “overshare”?
I used to think this was fine. Commendable even.
After all, if you are a solid guy with nothing to hide, why not be direct and lay it all out on the table?
Plus, I thought, don’t you want her to know more about you so she can know the real you?
Now I realize that this is an attraction killer.
If you are too available and too easy to understand it diminishes your desirability. Being overeager commoditizes your attention and interest.
Things that are too easy to obtain become less valuable. In this case, we’re talking about the obtainability of your deeper inner workings. What makes you you.
I’m not saying you should lie and deceive.
Just leave something to the imagination.
Generally, as a man, you’re better off listening more and opening your mouth less.
This gives you more information and prevents you from making all manner of mistakes, like sticking your foot in your mouth, for example.
Asking the occasional good question is far more important than sharing everything about yourself.
Of course, this can be taken too far. If you make yourself completely unavailable, then that will definitely cause problems with your connection to your partner.
Think of it this way: If you guys are together in 5 years from now, she should still be learning new things about you.
Let it unfold naturally. Don’t rush and overexpose yourself.
Seek to learn more about her.
This will automatically make you interesting to her.