You’re out in the world meeting ladies. Hoping to find the One.
At some point, most of them are going to lie to you.
This can happen for any number of reasons and to varying degrees.
Often, it’s just to protect themselves or their image (or your ego). Sometimes it can be for more nefarious reasons.
Chances are, if they’re lying to you, it could be because they are deceiving themselves.
Some lies are harmless, but others can really cost you.
You don’t want to be the guy she marries because she talks herself into the idea out of desperation to not be unmarried after her chosen age of 34, or whatever.
Some people really have a penchant for denial.
But hey, that’s humans.
What are ya gonna do?
You could call it quits and join a MGTOW forum to complain about the ills of womanity.
Or, you could do the hard work and bolster yourself against all manner of bullshittery.
If only there was some way you could become better at seeing through the amalgam of truth and lies…
Good news, cowboy!
You can cultivate a much greater level of truth-sight than you currently enjoy.
First of all, stop lying to yourself.
How can you see through other’s deceptions when you’re swimming in your own?
You can start with the easy stuff. Ease into the bigger, deeper stuff.
Be kind and compassionate. Don’t be a dick.
Think honesty, not cruelty.
Next, stop lying to other people all the time.
Start with the obvious lying. Then move on to more subtle stuff, like exaggerating or omission.
Look, I don’t know what your life looks like. What kind of people surround you. Your career…
You may actually have to lie for your life to work.
Telling the truth just isn’t always the best idea. It depends.
Just know that lying takes a toll. There is a price.
Generally, the less you lie, the better off you’ll be.
Seeing the truth requires a good relationship with the truth.
Trust yourself. Be trustworthy. Attract more honesty.
Another facet of this is just knowing what you actually want.
Are you putting out mixed signals?
That’s what happens when you’re confused or haven’t taken the time to get very clear about your values, desires, expectations.
You can set the context and create a space where she feels safe to be honest.
Once you know yourself and what you’re looking for, you can focus on her.
Notice if she contradicts herself. If she has her own ideas or just seems to be a chameleon.
Try to get a sense of how she lives her life.
If she isn’t being honest with herself and many other people in her life, then, yeah, you guessed it.
This is a matter of character.
Tune in to your body. Does your B.S. meter go off? Do you find yourself explaining away things?
This all comes back around on you.
You have to become centered and unattached enough to hear and see the signals. Otherwise, wishful thinking or desperation can cloud your vision.