She can smell your neediness a mile away.

It repels her.

Can you get away with being needy once in a while if you’re in a long-term relationship?

Sure.

We all have our bad days.

But if things aren’t going well in your relationship, or you’re just getting to know each other, then you better reign in your insecurities.

It will only make things worse.

It makes you look weak.

And if she is already having some questions or doubts about your future together, this will just be another nail (or three) in the coffin.

Now, more than ever, you must resist the temptation to badger her for answers, to seek her approval, to be validated by her.

I get it.

You’re dying to know what the Hell is going on!

But you have to take all that energy, pull it in, and direct it inward.

Use it as fuel to clean things up on your side.

What do I mean by that?

Look at your life. Your habits.

Are you living as your best self? Living like a man, or an adolescent?

Taking care of your body. Eating right. Exercising.

Managing stress. Pursuing your own interests outside of your shared interests?

Listen bud, you must find a way to generate your own security and validation from within.

Working out, spending time alone in nature, doing something you’re good at—all these things will help you feel more calm, centered, and confident.

It may feel like you need her right now. Her love, support, acknowledgement, commitment.

But honestly, you really don’t.

You’ll be fine.

The paradox here, is that when you start to accept this truth and feel stronger in yourself, you will give off a different vibe.

A vibe that is more more attractive to her.